Maggie Olore
4 min readSep 24, 2020

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5 THINGS TO LET GO OF YOUR EX

If letting An EX go was an Easy Horse to Ride, then our hearts wouldn’t be Caged in Deception

Sometimes relationships don’t go the way we expect it to go, it’s a battle where you are either a winner or a loser. We have all experienced lost love in our lives lingering like subtle poison.

In most cases we stick around and fail to move on with the hope that your ex-lover would at least find time and come back to you, That’s Bullshit. The mindset of clinging on to someone who for one or other reasons never wanted you in their lives should stop. There is always life after a failed relationship. Let it go

There are various reasons why the relationship didn’t work out, sometimes you know what happened, other times, you feel as though things slowly slipped away from you and you can’t quite pinpoint any one cause. But in any case, you’ve decided it’s time to let them go and move on.

You don’t have to run from your life, you have to handle the reality that your life is not with that person you once loved. You don’t have to get lost in someone’s arms, You need to stand on your ground.

Hermann Hesse once said “Some of us think holding on makes us strong; but sometimes it is letting go”.

Similar to this statement; when we let go people we loved, then we grow more strong, we mature in handling painful situations.

In order to let go ,you will have to these things without regretting.

Cut off contact.Hey, before you think of dating someone else or flittering with someone, cut the contact with your ex. You don’t need to be friends. Why are you keeping their contacts? The easiest way to let go and move on from your previous failed relationship is by cutting off the communication with them. This is least step to take but it is the prerequisite to move on.

You will never heal if you keep the person who hurt you close at hand, Cut communication, erase the pictures from your phone and anything else directly connected to them. You are not erasing their memory but cutting direct contact in times when you are weak and vulnerable.

Be with what you are feeling. It is okay to be with every emotion you are feeling, you either feel like crying, it’s okay to cry or you may choose to ignore the feeling and find ways to bottle them up or hide from the reality.

Face the pain head on and don’t run from it. Allow yourself to simply be with whatever you’re feeling, even if it’s uncomfortable. Over time, the mind has a way of settling itself if you allow it to focus in on the pain.

Let go of the fantasy. People often mourn the relationship they think they could have. It’s okay to mourn, but for how long are you going to hold back onto the past. Allow you mind to erase the memory over time, it is part of the internal healing process, let your body miss the fantasy moments, maybe it would work if I did A or B,with time you will move on.

This process is your brain trying to keep you away from the pain again. Be present for these feelings so that you maintain clarity. But it’s important to give yourself a reality check and remember that this a natural part of the process of healing. Stop the fantasy and move on.

Practice Forgiveness. When you reflect into your past affair with the person, you will realize you have a deep wound that needs to be sewn up in order for you to heal. Your heart is broken into pieces that when you look into a mirror, the reflection makes you hate the fact that you met this person once in a while but what will heal this wound is the Practice of Forgiveness.

You need to practice to let it go by forgiving. Forgiving doesn’t necessary mean you are forgiving the other person, but forgiving yourself. When you learn to forgive yourself first, then it is easy to forgive the other person and move on.

It’s not always the other person’s fault .Sometimes it’s our own. Whatever the case, you need to either practice visualizing the other person and repeating a simple mantra such as “I forgive you. My pain is my own” or imagine yourself apologizing and searching for those feelings of sincerity within you. When you can recognize this, the process has started working.

Understand the grieving process. This relationship is like death, we live today and we have to die sometime. We have to learn how to deal with the emotions that come with it, it’s fine to grieve, but how long are you going to grieve. Understand that is it okay to grieve of the lost lover but for certain period of time.

Denial and isolation, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance are all normal stages of the process and it’s important to remember that everyone grieves differently.

Besides understanding the grieving process, loving yourself more will help you let go of the ex because you can’t expect someone else to treat you better than you treat yourself.

If letting An EX go was an Easy Horse to Ride, then our hearts wouldn’t be Caged in Deception

Let’s talk about how to do that.

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Maggie Olore

I write real life stories that inspires personal growth.