5 Ways to Open Your Heart and Allow Someone to Love You
In the last few years, I have loved myself and flunked to give someone a chance to love me. When someone proposed for us to date, I became protective like a porcupine when nervous or under attack, it spreads out the quills and shakes the lower, hollow-tipped tail quills into a predator for maximum defense.
I felt it was normal and okay but in the long run, I have started to yarn for love, someone to call me, a shoulder to lean on, someone to hug, and a sense of belonging. I have had a series of men who wanted me to date them, I agreed and along the way, when I met them, I lost interest, either I was disappointed in the date or our energy didn’t connect. I believe in energy connection and when the energy we feel is not rhyming, then we can’t move forward.
This year, I have challenged myself to fall in love and be loved for who I am without changing to be someone else and authentic, and in this journey, I am walking with you and learning and sharing experiences with you.
Love is a beautiful and fulfilling emotion that everyone desires to experience. However, allowing someone to love you can sometimes feel challenging. It requires vulnerability, trust, and a willingness to open your heart. If you find it difficult to let someone in because of your past failed relationship that was violent, I am here to share five ways to help you overcome your barriers and create space for love to flourish.
1. Embrace Self-Love:
Before you can fully allow someone to love you, it's crucial to cultivate a strong sense of self-love. Understand that you are deserving of love and respect, just like anyone else. Take care of yourself physically, emotionally, and mentally. Engage in small activities that bring you joy like watching a movie, traveling, reading, and hanging out with friends. Practice self-care, and develop healthy boundaries. By loving yourself, you will attract healthier relationships and be more open to receiving love from others.
2. Release Past Emotional Baggage:
You all have been in a relationship that tore you apart and you even failed to forgive the ones who hurt you or get over the relationship, Every time you think of that relationship, you become sad and pale. I know Past hurts and heartbreaks can create emotional barriers that hinder your ability to let someone love you. Take time to reflect on past experiences and release any residual pain or resentment. Seek closure, forgiveness, or therapy if necessary. By addressing and resolving past wounds, you can create space in your heart for new love to enter. Remember, the past should not define your future relationships, that was one of the paths you were to pass.
3. Build Trust Gradually:
It is very hard for you who have been heartbroken to trust again and even if you are to trust, you 0.01% but you have to know that trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship. However, it takes time to build and cannot be rushed. Allow trust to develop naturally by openly communicating with your partner and sharing your thoughts and feelings. Give them the chance to prove their trustworthiness through their actions, consistency, and reliability. Building trust gradually will make it easier for you to let down your guard and allow love to flow.
4. Be Vulnerable and Authentic:
Opening up and being vulnerable is necessary to create a deep connection with someone. Share your dreams, fears, and insecurities with your partner. Allow yourself to be open and honest about your feelings, fears, and desires. Share your thoughts and experiences with someone you trust, and let them into the more personal aspects of your life. This openness creates a deeper connection and makes it easier for others to reciprocate with their own vulnerability and authenticity.
5. Practice Active Listening:
Effective communication is key to building strong and loving relationships. Actively listening to your partner’s thoughts, feelings, and concerns without any bias and judgement demonstrates care and respect. Give them your undivided attention and avoid interrupting or judging. By fostering open and listening communication, creates a supportive environment where both parties feel heard and understood. When you communicate your needs, it allows the other person to respond appropriately and helps build trust.
I know that opening your heart is a gradual process, and it’s okay to take it one step at a time. Building trust and fostering emotional intimacy takes patience, but the rewards can be profound and I challenge you to let someone come into your life and love you.
As Pablo Neruda says “I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.”